You Had Me At Idiot

I'm Back, Sort Of

Well, okay, yeah... So back in April of 2011 I was getting ready to move from North Carolina back to San Diego. I decided to take a few weeks off from the blog until we were moved. Okay, so... here I am again. But not really. I'm actually over here now: vandalayindustries.com. New blog, fresh start. But I'll keep this one up in case anybody wants to read any of the old posts, and because I'm too lazy to take it down. By the way, did you hear we shot bin Laden? That was weird, huh?

Lost, Synopsis #1

So basically I'm about 10 years behind everyone else on, well... pretty much everything. Today I started watching the first season of Lost. For anyone who happens to just now be coming out of a decade long coma and missed the entire series like I did, here's my quick capsule synopsis so far (Caution! Spoiler Alert!)...

Okay, there's this airplane and it crashes on a tropical island. And everyone dies except a bunch of supermodels who just happened to survive essentially unscathed. But to make the show realistic and appeal to people in the midwest, the producers also threw in a really fat kid and a creepy old guy who looks like Gene Hackman. Good move.

One of the supermodels is a doctor, another supermodel is a fugitive from the law, another supermodel is a dick with a southern accent, another supermodel is a guy who looks like a terrorist but I don't think he is, another supermodel is pregnant, another supermodel is a brother/sister tandem, another supermodel is an abusive Asian husband/wife tandem, another supermodel is a labrador retriever, etc.

Oh, and Merry from Lord of the Rings crashed on the plane too. But I think the plane crashed after Lord of the Rings was already finished filming. So that's good, because otherwise they would probably have had somebody like Keanu Reeves or Mel Gibson or Denzel Washington play the part of Merry. And that would have just been weird.

Oh, and apparently bigfoot lives in the jungle on the island. But I haven't seen him yet so I can't confirm this. It's either bigfoot or they were filming Jurassic Park there at the same time.

Oh, and nobody ever gets hungry or goes to the bathroom.

I'll keep y'all informed as I watch and learn more. I bet somebody is gonna have sex at some point.

And then when I'm completely finished reviewing the entire series of Lost, I'll get started right away on season 1 of American Idol and let you know what happens.

Funny Story About Sam Kinison's Funeral

Recently I performed in Laughlin, Nevada. It's the same city where Sam Kinison was traveling to perform back in the early 90s when he died in an accident. On my way to my gig, I drove down that same road. This got me to thinking a bit about Sam and a famous story told by another comedian (in the book I Killed: Stories of the Road from America's Top Comics), who was at his funeral. I love this story:

"Sam Kinson was a big influence on me. He was really the first comedian to achieve rock-star status. So when I got to get to know him at The Comedy Store in the early 90’s, I felt very lucky. Within a year of getting to know each other, Sam died. When Carl Labove (Sam’s best friend) called The Comedy Store,
just hours after Sam had died in the car accident, I was the guy who answered the phone. It was terrible. That week I went with my girlfriend, now my wife, Margo, to Forest Lawn in Burbank, California, for Sam’s funeral. The chapel was packed wall-to-wall with comedians and celebrities. Richard Belzer emceed the ceremony. Many of Kinson’s friends and family spoke. Pauly Shore talked
about Sam’s being like a brother to him and how Sam used to baby-sit him. When Carl Labove was asked to speak, the place went silent. We all knew Carl had been with Sam when he died. Carl spoke for a while and then began to cry, so upset he couldn’t speak. Richard Belzer finally came up to the podium to help Carl down. The whole place was a mess, everyone sobbing. Then, just as Carl was
almost back to his seat, he broke free from Richard and ran back to the microphone. He’d stopped crying, and with a big smile on his face he said, 'By the way, I’ll be at Igby’s all week! Two shows Friday, three Saturday.' It was hilarious, and a nice ending to Sam’s funeral."